Awaken Podcast

the healing journey

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the healing journey

Healing starts with acknowledgement. You can not change what you don’t acknowledge. If you believe that an enhancement in your life is required, then your desire to accomplish that enhancement will be greater than any fear you might encounter. You deserve to know the version of you that is the greatest. It is you who can unlock and unleash the lion or lioness. Walk it, talk it, believe it, grasp it, and embody it.

Acceptance and Mindful Energy

Healing starts with acknowledgement. You can not change what you don’t acknowledge. If you believe that an enhancement in your life is required, then your desire to accomplish that enhancement will be greater than any fear you might encounter. You deserve to know the version of you that is the greatest. It is you who can unlock and unleash the lion or lioness. Walk it, talk it, believe it, grasp it, and embody it.

Awaken Episode 2

Hello, welcome to Awaken. My name is Zeinab Hamid. This podcast is a safe space for us to discuss real-life experiences. My mission in life is to normalize vulnerability and discuss the elements of personal growth. We live in a world where we are categorized for what we can do for people materially rather than how we make people feel. I'm going to start this podcast by talking about myself. Let's start, and my story will show you that rock bottom is the best place to build a foundation for the rest of your life. Throughout these episodes, I will be sharing the most intimate parts of my life and what I learned along the way. I would like to set a disclosure that my content includes vivid real-life events, so please be advised.

Awaken Launch

Awaken Introduction:
Hello, welcome to Awaken. My name is Zeinab Hamid. This podcast is a safe space for us to discuss real-life experiences. My mission in life is to normalize vulnerability and discuss the elements of personal growth. We live in a world where we are categorized for what we can do for people materially rather than how we make people feel. I'm going to start this podcast by talking about myself. Let's start and let my story show you that rock bottom is the best place to build your foundation for the rest of your life. Throughout these episodes, I will be sharing the most intimate parts of my life and what I learned along the way. I would like to set a disclosure that my content includes abuse in almost every form, so please be advised.
Body:
I am a woman of many distinct characteristics. My past has played such an immense role in shaping and molding me into the woman I am today. I lived most of my life in the shadows, ruled by fear and shame to speak and be heard. My fear stemmed from a belief that was passed on through generations. A fear that a woman must stay silent when faced with oppression and pain. For years, I complied with and accommodated those traditional and cultural values. I said yes when I wanted to say no., I stayed quiet when I was screaming. I made excuses when the excuse was not valid. I created a story when the story was not a reason to project pain onto someone else. I watched the people around me and recognized a pattern. A pattern I didn’t want to be a part of. I knew I was meant for more. The shadows were not a place I wanted to be, and in the same breath, I was so fearful of being seen. I always say that I am so shy. When I was just afraid. I am a proud Muslim woman who holds that title with a great deal of pride and reward. As we get deeper into the story, I want to articulate that my religion celebrates a woman and holds her as the most valuable creation. God says in the Quran that a woman must be protected, and somehow, the culture and traditions took that as meaning she needs to be controlled.
 
As a woman of God, I began to research I learned that God was not unjust in a way where he would want his creation to stay quiet and not hold the oppressor accountable. I grew more knowledge and acquired a sense of power. I knew that the next decision I had to make was a decision that would isolate me but bring me closer to him. So, I did it. I walked with my head held high. I strutted through the streets like I AM HERE. Where? For what? To accomplish what generations of women have stayed silent about. I walked into that courtroom room sitting in a seat and told my story to a bunch of familiar and unfamiliar people. People looked at me with shame and disgust. They hated me, I said. Some faces looked at me with pride and were proud of my stance. What's my stance? I was abused by an extended family member. As I sat and spoke, I looked at the tears flowing down the faces of my loved ones, and the hatred in the faces of so many familiar faces. That was a pivot. The day when everything changed. I changed. I felt free for a moment. I wiped my tears while the story flowed through my tongue. The moment when your life changes is not always the best moment. It's sometimes a moment of unhinged pain. A pain that will leave you crippled. I always ask myself, “Why me? Why did I have to tell my story? Why did I have to do it? Why was nothing done before it got to me? Why was silence the solution for so many years? I will tell you why, because I was the one whom God wanted to do it. That was my assignment. I was born to rattle the cage. I was created to speak softly, but my words, combined with his favor, fell like grenades. I was created to be water and fire. A contradiction, but a beautiful reminder that you can be strong and vulnerable.
 
The shame and guilt of what happened after he was sentenced created a war within me. The battle between the mind and the heart. A battle that most people live with for their entire lives. The mind says one thing, and the heart projects another thing. My mind was proud, but my heart was ashamed. What I understood later was that the shame was never mine; it was the community that saw my actions as shameful. They crucified me for defending myself. Like the abuse wasn’t enough, now I had to deal with the ridicule and name-calling. I was isolated and shunned. All in the name that God said you are wrong. Now that I think of that, I laugh because, like I said before, God is not unjust; he would never allow a woman to stay silent in the presence of an oppressor. I had to grow to learn that, though. God doesn’t say Be wary of what people think of you. God says Be wary of what I think of you.
 
Now that I look back, I am so thankful for the isolation because it brought me closer to my best friend, God. I walk with his hand on my shoulder and his light as my armor. My armor is God, and I feel it. He doesn’t allow me to stay down too long. I called on him while kneeling and hysterically crying, and a sense of ease flowed through my body. That’s who my God is. He is almighty and merciful, Fire and water.  He preaches for peace and war when necessary. He just asks for us to be just in our decisions and speak the truth. The truth is what he will hold us all accountable for. The truth is the only thing that will bring you peace. Authenticity is a required state of being to accomplish peace in your life. So, you may ask, “Do you regret any of your decisions and I will proudly say NO. My decisions molded me, and can you believe that God saw me as strong enough to carry this assignment all the way through? What people fail to realize is that our bodies are only a vessel we are meant to care for them just for a short period and when God calls us back to him, we take our souls we take our characters, the way we made people feel, the love we showed and the deeds we committed. That’s what is important. To get to this realization, I had to go through many tests. God's test comes through suffering. The lessons are taught by him through hardship. The pain happens for us, not to us. So, what did I learn through my pain? I became resilient, brave, and full of courage, and I learned to trust myself. I learned that my will comes from God. That no matter what happens, I will always rise.
 
The awakening happens when you surrender. Surrender to the lessons and allow yourself to be taught through the grace of God. The test is just that a test. The test will either fail or pass, and you get to choose which one. Just know if you do fail, it's ok, you will make it. Failure is also a lesson; you now have a blueprint of what not to do next time. Think of failure like this: let's say you get an answer wrong on a test, and you Google the answer, and now you learned the answer; that’s what failure is, it's just putting us in a place to be taught the right way.
 
Awaken the fire. Awaken the truth, Awaken the grace, Awaken the authenticity, Awaken the student, Awaken the vulnerability, awaken the alignment, and align your mind, body, and soul. Tell the story and be free. Freedom is accomplished through what we fear. If there is fear, there is no freedom. Awaken to your freedom. Until next time. Awaken.